How To Make a Lasting Change in Any Area Of Your Life
“Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.” You need to make a lasting change in all areas for a better life. Besides, true life is lived when tiny changes occur.
We are all looking for a change, but why is the change short-lived, and do we start quitting once we see a little bit of progress? Tune in to listen as we discuss what inspires a lasting change, distress versus eustress, uncertainty and how you can turn your stress into a motivating factor.
Quotes on Change
- Money does not change people, but it shows who they are. Once you have the resources, you tend to be the person whom you have always admired to become. Inadequate resources limit people to being themselves
- 99% of people let other people’s opinions and beliefs keep them from being who they want. You might fear letting down people close to you. Like what will your sister, brother or mother think once you take a different direction?
- If you want to change your life, raise your standards. What creates a lasting change is when your should’s become must’s. Once you know you have to do something and there is no alternative, that’s change. You might try for days or months, but eventually, you will get there.
- Kicking a habit constitutes change, but the change need not occur in a dramatic manner. You will need to make a dramatic change in life, but it is not something you can do in just a day.
The changing Factor, Inspiration or desperation?
What drives change? Is it inspiration and desperation? Most people will often change out of desperation compared to inspiration.
The actual change is out of desperation.
“I got dumped, started working out. I got dumped again, and started working on self-development. I was fired, moved back with my mom, partied but later started my own company since I could not let my livelihood lie in their hands.”
Most people fail to change because they are comfortable. So, ask yourself what that one thing you need to do and start doing it.
Fear of Unknown
Have you ever asked yourself why some people keep rewatching the same show so many times, yet they already know the outcome? It’s all about certainty. People always want certainty and prefer to go back to the same pain because they are familiar with it.
Although the certain pain may be worse, you tend to go for it easily compared to the unknown. You might stay in financial distress or a bad relationship because you fear changing to the unknown.
Principles of Psychology
“By age 30, the character has set like plaster and it will never soften again.” As our lives become more consistent in adulthood, change is less likely to occur. As you get older, you become more comfortable, and change can only be influenced if an event or something more powerful happens.
Changing Others
We all know somebody capable of more. However, you might give them all the necessary resources for change, but they still won’t change.
For instance, you can send someone to the best rehab, but they won’t change because they do not want to.
It is all in the mindset, and if someone wants to change, they have to make it a priority.
“ You can make others change but only through manipulation. The change is going to be temporary, not real.”
Reasons for failure while making lasting change.
Good is the enemy of great. Once you start making little progress, you can be a bit comfortable, lose inspiration and not work towards the end goal.
People do not make changes because they are overwhelmed. They tend to think they have to do everything at once. However, it is something you do daily and keeps adding to it.
Distress and Eustress
While distress refers to stress that negatively affects you, Eustress refers to positive stress that motivates and energizes you to make a change.
No one wakes up motivated. Motivation is bullshit, but action creates motivation. It is better to walk for five minutes than not walk at all.
Healthy stress is good since if you have zero stress, how will you get motivated?
How do you turn stress into a motivator?
The aim is never to avoid stress. Everyone has stress, but how do you turn the stress into a motivator?
- Identify what you stress about.
- What can you do about it?
- What help do you need?
- What was the last time you had such negative emotions, and what did you do about it?
- Figure out how you can come up with the solution in 60 seconds if you don’t go back to the drawing board.
Having a purpose
Although it sounds cliché, you need to have a “why” for a lasting change. Why do you want to change? You will not be consistent unless you identify “why”, which is your motivation factor.
For a change, either you get comfortable where you are, find a why or just wait for enough desperation.
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